“After Losing My Daughter, I Just Wanted to Take My Life”

Grief Nearly Cost Linda Her Life, but She Found Hope and a Future. Read Her Inspiring Story

My daughter passed away, and I was just searching and wondering and trying to figure out, you know, how to go on after losing a child that passed away in my arms. I was just trying to figure out what happened. I was just lost.

She wasn’t feeling well, and she called the paramedics herself. I went to the hospital. She couldn’t breathe. I said, “Britney, are you okay?” She said, “Yes, mama.” “Are you sure?” She said, “Yes, but I’m having a hard time breathing.”

It was like 12 o’clock in the afternoon, so I stayed with her all day. I said, “You are going to be okay?” She said, “Okay.” And then, all of a sudden, she looked at me and said, “Mommy! What’s happening?” And all of a sudden, she just collapsed.

And I said, “Lord, let Britney stay here and take me because she’s young. I already lived my life. I’ll go. Just let Britney stay here, and just let me go.”

I came to a point where I wanted to take my own life. But I said, “No, if I take my life now, I have two other daughters. What are they going to do?” But I was at that point of, “I’ll just take my own life.”

I checked myself into a facility. I said, “You know, I need some help! I got to go get some help.” So I went and checked my own self in. I knew something wasn’t right with me. I think I stayed about 30 days in a treatment facility for depression and anxiety.

I had insomnia. I couldn’t eat, and I was depressed. I was sad, but I would always put on a happy face, “Oh, everything is great!” But deep down inside, I was so sad and broken.

During the pandemic, they said, “Close everything up.” I fell into that. They said, “No churches are open.” But I noticed The Universal Church was open.* I said, “Something is going on in that church. I got to find out.” But then I thought, “They are supposed to be closed.” Little did I know that I needed to be in the church.

I said, “I’m going in to find out what’s going on.” When I came in, I was received. I wasn’t pushed away. They just listened to whatever I was talking about. They just listened. I started feeling that peace that I needed.

As I kept doing my Chain of Prayer and hearing people’s testimonies as to where they were and how the Holy Spirit helped them. I said, “Well, I’ll start doing that too. I must see what the Holy Spirit is about.” As a leap of faith, I surrendered all my life to God on the Altar—I committed to putting Him first, doing His will, and seeking the Holy Spirit.

I was listening to everybody else’s testimonies and could see how God was changing other people. I said, “If it changed for them, I know it will happen for me.” I just learned how to trust God. Everything just started lifting. It was as if scales were falling off. All the stuff that was hindering me just started falling off.

If you need any type of help, come to The Universal Church to find out. Talk to people. Talk to somebody. Don’t try to go through it alone. I believe that you will be helped here like I was.

—Linda

*Disclaimer: During the COVID-19 pandemic shutdowns, The Universal Church had online and phone conference prayer services instead of large physical gatherings. However, while complying with state and local laws and restrictions, the doors of the church remained open for individual counseling and prayer, respecting mask mandates, temperature screenings, distancing rules, and proper disinfecting of spaces.