“My Mom Said to Me That the World Was Too Small for Both of Us”

 
We started fighting so much, and one day, she came to me and said that the world was too small for both of us. My mom hit me sometimes to the point of sending me to the hospital.

And then I started growing up with that rejection inside of me. I cried a lot. And another fact is that I had seizures. Sometimes I was afraid to have those seizures in front of people and see them laugh and make fun of me.

So one night, I can’t forget that night, I said, “I’m going to kill myself. I’m going to wait until my family goes to sleep.” I used to live by the expressway, and then I said, “I will let everybody go to sleep and go to throw myself under a truck.”

No trucks passed by the house. That was unbelievable to me. I was so aggravated because there were no trucks. Heavy trucks would pass by all the time. There were no trucks that night. So I fell asleep on the street.

The fights in my house were still the same, and one day I decided, “Now it has to happen. I’m going to kill myself.” And I did the same thing. I waited until everybody went to sleep. I went to the street and again, no trucks passed by that night. I fell asleep on the side of the highway.

I said, “What’s wrong with me?” I got all the medicines they had in my house, and I took all of them at once, and I went to sleep. At that point, I was sick. I went to sleep thinking I wouldn’t wake up, but I did. I woke up, and that was the worst feeling of my life.

Then one day, my aunt went to my house and said, “I’m going to The Universal Church; let’s go with me.” I said, “Go to church?! What am I going to do in church?” I said that because nothing had changed in my whole life, and I grew up in a church. What could be different?

But at that point, I had nothing to lose. I went, and it was one of the best days of my life!

The pastor said, “Talk to God now like you are the only one here and you are in front of Him.” I started crying. I couldn’t speak anymore. I just cried and cried. And then, I felt someone put their hand on my head and pray for me.

I felt calm, and I decided to give it a chance. I kept going. I got involved with the Youth Power Group (YPG). I started loving being with the youths, and I felt something different about them because they were not with me to take advantage of me, but to help me.

Then it was introduced to me the Fast of Daniel to receive the Holy Spirit. And then I said, “You know what? I have been hearing about the Holy Spirit. I don’t have Him. I need Him.”

During the Fast of Daniel, I started doing things I had never done before, with so much love. And then I started reading the Bible more than I used to. I want to give God my everything. Everything I have, everything I have on my body, all the strength I have, everything about the knowledge I can have about him.

I was evangelizing more. I was totally there. On the last day of the Fast of Daniel, it seems like it was just God and me; I didn’t hear anybody.

I cannot explain the love. Today, when I see people, I want to say, “Stop crying, stop suffering. There is something you have to know, and this is true. It’s a love bigger than you can imagine.”

I have a wonderful relationship with my kids. I have a good relationship with my husband. But the relationship with God is something no one can replace. There is no comparison.

After I received the Holy Spirit, I know what love really is. And I don’t have doubts anymore. He clears things out for me right away. I have strength; I know everything is possible for me once I count on Him.

God guides me in everything: my way to live, to deal with my husband, to deal with my kids. My husband comes with me to church; my kids come to church because they see my testimony.

Now I’m a strong person because I know what I can do through the God I serve. Everything is possible for me because I know where my strength comes from.

—Michele
 
 

DISCLAIMER: The Universal Church advises not to dismiss medical treatment. The prayers, elements, and tools of faith are not a replacement for medical treatment but a complement/support to it. Please follow your doctor’s instructions along with using your faith in the Word of God.